I’m always amazed at how often Taco Bell manages to come out with new products. I’m pretty sure they are the champions of fast food product development. I hope their R&D department is well paid, because those folks churn out a new twist on “Mexican” food at least once a month. The imagination they must have! So, in an effort to stay abreast of the Taco Bell situation (and to keep the little dish classy), we’re offering you a new feature: ‘Keeping Up With the Bell’. Whatever they dream up, we’re going to eat.
On this initial installment, we’re tasting the Black Jack Taco… Yeah, it’s not going to last long. Here’s what it’s supposed to be:
“A crunchy black taco shell filled with seasoned beef, zesty pepper jack sauce, shredded lettuce, and a blend of three cheeses: cheddar, pepper jack, and mozzarella.”
Here’s what it’s actually like: Your normal Taco Bell taco shell with meat. The shell apparently isn’t made out of blue corn; my guess is that it’s dyed that color. So you take the normal taco, slather on a strange mayonnaise-y sauce that doesn’t taste “zesty” or “pepper jack-ish” at all, and sprinkle on a generous helping of tasteless cheese. It’s bad, even by Taco Bell’s standards. Underwhelmed & kinda grossed out, we considered that maybe we were being overly-harsh because we’re not ultra-familiar with Taco Bell’s normal fare. Perhaps this is what we should have expected?
To get an expert’s opinion we turned to our resident Taco Bell expert. She’s someone who not only eats at Taco Bell on a regular basis, but also really likes it. She’s the ideal audience for the Black Jack Taco. In her words (during the tasting): “Disgusting… OMG that is mayonnaise-y. What is this?”
So there you have it, the word from our expert. Taco Bell failed on this one. But it’s not a huge failure; they’ll have another chance in the next week or two when they move on to their next big idea…
In the world of fashion and music, the mash-up/collaboration has been all the rage for the past few years. Reebok shoes mixed with Monopoly or Elton John vs. Jay Z. They are everywhere. They don’t always improve upon a product but in some cases magic happens and the public is presented with a new item to change the landscape of consumerism.
Behold, the Chelada is such magic. Simplifying the age old combo of beer and tomato juice into a one stop, time saving combo. I’ve spent years of my life waiting for this. Usually I’m deterred by the extra effort it takes in making this drink so I just settle for the beer, or sometimes the tomato juice. Sometimes when you make that quick run to QT they don’t always have cold Clamato, putting on a cramp on my late night drinking. But alas, the problem has been solved. Convenience has won out. I can now drink my Clamato and Bud with ease. Oh thank you America.
Now if only I liked to drink Budweiser. Someone get on that.
I hope you realize how awesome this is. First of all, if you aren’t familiar with the Hollywood heavy weight, Steven Segal, all you need to know is that he used to make killer karate movies with titles like Above the Law and Marked for Death. These were classics of the 90’s and from there he launched a lucrative acting career. And now it’s 2008 and it seems that his career has hit a new high. God bless whoever had the idea of putting this man’s face on the side of an energy drink. It makes my month.
I came across these little delights in the store one day, and instantly purchased them. Who wouldn’t. Later when I got home I immediately drank one, and amazingly….they were horrible. Weird aftertaste, disgusting beginning taste. An all around displeasure, but come on it’s Steven Seagal. One thing is for certain, if I ever get back on the energy drink train, the Lightning Bolt will be the one for me. Not because they taste great, (because they taste bad) but because his face and quote are on the side of every can. And if that doesn’t make you cool and envied, nothing will.
